A chronology of paying attention (19): Farewell Gifts

In this season that my time is called for in places other than writing new posts, my Father gave me this idea:  Ponder and notice again the words I've already written once, keep praying the beads of memory in this sacramental life.  I've skipped about 20 years in the chronological order because this week marks our three-year anniversary in Austin.  Three years ago today I shared this post about the lavish generosity our New York friends.  I don't ever want to forget it.

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Farewell Gifts

I wrote about our friends giving us a fond farewell with so many abundantly-spilled-out gifts, right?  I thought I'd share a few excerpts and photos here in this space.

First of all, there've been worker-bee type gifts, getting our house ready to sell:  (several of these were the same horse-bee-angel people I told you about helping us move into this same house three years ago!)

Then, there were the two, extra-mile friends (and their little cutie-pie) who helped us organize all of our crap gently-used items for a big, ol' moving sale.  Plus, all the wonderful people who showed up to support us in the blazing heat and bought stuff (and I'm thinking more than a few of them bought stuff just to be nice.)

I didn't take a picture of the garage sale. Pretty average stuff.
 But this dinner to celebrate with our generous, kind-hearted, helper friends
 was way above-average Chinese cooking!

All along, behind my back, the Worship & Arts team I've been privileged to serve with for 13 years and lead for the last three were putting together the World's Most Perfect Farewell Party.  

It looked a bit like this:

With amazing works of culinary art that looked something like this:

After that, these people gave words, songs, laughs, and other assorted gifts with jaw-dropping generosity.  They made me laugh and they made me cry.  Sometimes both at the same time:

But, mostly, they made me cry.  Like when Coleen read an essay of the last eight years of our family's friendship.

"Let's go to Cleveland" we all said. "Test the waters of a Murphy/Gravelding mini-family vacation. If it sucks, at least we've seen the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame." 

So we all chuck our anxiety-filled rejection issues about close friendships and decide to go all-in."

Scott's song-words in "Laughter and Lament":

"Seems like yesterday, church bells, Boston, October morning...
So swift the news came, left us feeling stranded without a warning.
But this family is bigger than a couple of thousand miles...So we'll put on our good brave face...and smile.

It's not phony you see, just a little hard to accept...Your stepping out, even letting go of dreams you've kept.
Cue the heartstrings, enough sad things...choking words too many or too few.
Strike up the band, let's join hands...maybe a praise chorus will do.

Everybody sing where you are...Tomorrow we may be too far
From each other and one another.
Everybody listen when we go...Hear the journey God only knows
The laughter and lament as we ebb and flow...."

Andrea's song, "Piece of You":

"We have shared each other's sorrows
Validated hurts and fears
Loudly applauded days of triumph
Bared our souls and witnessed tears

But we both know every great story twists and changes
Unexpected bends in the road
when today becomes little more than a memory,
I want you to know, I want you to know
There's a piece of you written up on me."

Brett's poem, "The Table":

"The anchoress has walked without a camera, with one hand plunged in

Puget Sound and the other in your exploding right.

She cries 'Glorious! Incandescent!' as she feels the spinning hole spin.

           The light

That burned her wings is showing mine within

The Mirror of Day's silver backing, Night.

It issues shimmering from shivering kingdom culverts. Before me

Tonight in light of its veilless valence I am able 

To see each molecule vibrate within this glow-glory

            table.

And I in trance substantial tell its story

Of insatiable realness, exorbitant and stable."

There was so much more. Dawn and Debbie's unassuming hilarity, Pastor Sal's words of affirmation, Christine's unknown challenge to me from Proverbs 31, Margaret's superb selection of readings from L'Engle.  And presents. Oh the presents!  Money to purchase art, hand-crafted jewelry, photographs and drawings.  I am a woman welled-over with gratitude.

And there's more to say.  But not today.  Today I need to sleep for a few hours and then pack my four courageous, kingdom-culvert children plus one speckly dog into two cars and follow my husband to Austin.  We're still licking our wounds a bit, I'll admit.  Still in mourning over lost dreams.  Still shaking our heads at the lunacy of leaving behind these once-in-a-lifetime kind of friendships.

But I'm thinking long about Louisville or Little Rock, we'll throw our black armbands out the window and holler at  the big Texas sky.  Or maybe, as the lyrics in my friend Scott's song:

"Just maybe you will be singing this song
When the whole Murphy clan grabs Austin by the hand and says,
'Baby, here we are'..."

Day 15 (art meditations + suggested resources for Advent)

"Advent is about learning to wait. It is about not having to know exactly what is coming tomorrow, only that whatever it is, it is of the essence of sanctification for us. Every piece of it, some hard, some uplifiting, is sign of the work of God alive in us. We are becoming as we go. We learn in Advent to stay in the present, knowing that only the present well lived can possibly lead us to the fullness of life." (Chittister)




During Advent I'll forego my weekly Buy More Art posts in order to share almost-daily meditations of Scripture, hymns, and art reflecting the alternate narrative and subversive time of waiting in hope for the Christ who came, the Christ who will come again and the Christ now among us.

Won't you join me?


Second Saturday of Advent:

The Prophet Elijah and the Fiery Chariot
Russian icon, unknown artist
14th century

[from Sirach, one of the Hebrew historical books written during the 400 years of silence between Old and New Testaments]

 Then there arose the fiery prophet Elijah, whose words blazed like a torch. He brought a famine on the people, and many of them died because of his persistence. Speaking in the name of the Lord, he kept the rain from coming, and on three occasions he called down fire.

You were taken up to heaven in a fiery whirlwind, a chariot drawn by fiery horses. The scripture says that you are ready to appear at the designated time, to cool God's anger before it breaks out in fury; that you will bring parents and children together again, and restore the tribes of Israel. Fortunate are those who live to see you come, as well as those who have already died in love, for we too shall live.

Matthew 17:10-13

English Standard Version (ESV)

¹⁰ And the disciples asked him, “Then why do the scribes say that first Elijah must come?” ¹¹ He answered, “Elijah does come, and he will restore all things. ¹² But I tell you that Elijah has already come, and they did not recognize him, but did to him whatever they pleased. So also the Son of Man will certainly suffer at their hands.” ¹³ Then the disciples understood that he was speaking to them of John the Baptist.

The Transfiguration
Titian, 1560-65

Song of response: Let All Mortal Flesh Keep Silence

Suggested Resources for Advent:

Three favorite recently-produced albums by church worship teams for Advent - 

  A Child is Born by Sojourn Music (Louisville, KY)



 Christmas by Castle Island Hymns (Boston, MA)


 The Mystery of Godliness by CTK Music (Raleigh, NC)


Interested in why our family values the season of Advent?  Read our post: Family liturgies for Advent and a confession from an exhausted Dad at Christmas

Now it's your turn!  What art are you enjoying this season? 

 Tell us about it in the  comments below.  

If you've written your own post, share the link.

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"I keep expecting loud and impressive events to convince me and others of God's saving powers. Our temptation is to be distracted by them. When I have no eyes for the small signs of God's presence ... I will always remain tempted to despair." -- Henri Jozef Machiel Nouwen, Gracias! A Latin American Journal (1983)  (via Diary of An Arts Pastor)

2011- A Year of Blessed

I have a stack of unwritten-upon Christmas cards coupled with equally blank mailing envelopes.  I may or may not ever get them sent this year.  Instead I offer you our New Year's family newsletter (via photos).  This exercise of looking backward in preparation for looking forward never fails to humble me, fill me with hope and a sense of counting the cost for new days, dreams and sacrifices ahead.

Glory be to Father, Son and Spirit for all.  

From our family to yours, a holler of thanksgiving for 2011 and a whisper of hope for 2012.

Comfort & Joy,

Tamara (for all)

Music & photo credits: Words to Build A Life On by Mike Crawford and His Secret Siblings (I blogged about this song here). *note: I accidentally uploaded three songs for this smilebox before I made my final decision.  If you just can't get enough of our family slideshow you'll hear two more songs:  Home by Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros and Hunting Song by Where's Ulysses.(I blogged about this album here.) Also, so many of the photos I chose were shared with us by friends and family.  Two of the photos came from strangers and I want to include credit.  Unfortunately,  I've lost track of the news media site that provided the photo of President Obama greeting the House pages at last year's State of the Union address; please forgive me unknown photographer!  The photo of the wooden figure of Christ carrying his cross comes from Ann Voskamp's site.  (I've blogged about the Cradle to Cross wreath we've purchased from her family here.)

Austin, Nice to Meet You: weeks 3-6

Keeping up with this week's promised miscellany, a list of our past few weeks here in Austin:

1.  Have I mentioned Chuy's yet?  So, I might have been a teensy bit biased coming into Austin because of the consistent rave reviews from this guy.  Still and all, it's just plain good Tex-Mex, served up by super friendly wait staff in a fun and funky building. Plus, even if none of that were true, Chuy's would still have their creamy jalepeno (which is kind of like crack for tortilla chips; the perfect blend of creamy and spicy flavours).

A couple of Mondays ago, on Brian's day off, we went to Chuy's for lunch and I remembered to bring my camera.  Also, you'll notice I'm keeping up my tradition of frozen margaritas for lunch.  I think it'll help me become more Texan.

there's salsa, fresh guac and then there's creamy jalepeno!

this was our visit to Chuy's our first weekend in Austin;
 my little friend Annie is demonstrating her technique
 for getting the most out of creamy jalepeno

Brian + Tamara = fun Mondays

2.  I promise I do more things here than eat, but I just want to tell you about the mod coffeehouse where my new friend Micha and I met up about two weeks ago.  Flightpath Coffeehouse, in the historic Hyde Park neighborhood, claims to be Austin's oldest coffeehouse.  The coffee was good, the pumpkin bread perfect, the wireless free and the neighborhood lovely for walking so Micha's baby boy could nap.  I'm hoping to go back here occasionally to write or read.  

I forgot my camera so I'm hoping they don't mind me
 borrowing these from their website?

3.  Speaking of Micha, have I mentioned how we met?  It really is just a fun story so let me tell it one more time on this nifty little timeline:

• 5 years ago:  I began stalking reading this guy's blog.  Somewhere along the way, I heard him mention this worship leader/songwriter intending to write and record a song for all 150 of the Psalms.  I was intrigued and...
• 2 years ago:  I invited him to be a featured artist at Union Center's art show (incidentally, that's also how I met this guy).  Then the piano playing psalm-loving poet cyber-introduced me to this lovely and amazing woman and...
• about 1 1/2 years ago we became blogging friends (partly inspired by the fact that she and I had similar jobs in our respective churches).  Last December she commissioned a poet from San Francisco for their church's Advent celebration.  I read the poems and tucked the poet's name in my memory.
• 2 months ago, when I posted the news about our move to Austin, Haley cyber-introduced Micha and me because both of our families were moving to the SAME city during the SAME month from opposite sides of the country (mine from NY, hers from San Francisco).
•  It gets even weirder.  Micha's family preceded us into town and one of their first Sundays here decided to visit a little Anglican church they'd found online: Christ Church Austin.  Yep, you guessed it.  The one and the same church who had called us to Texas in the first place.  

Crazy, right?  Since Micha and I have met in person we realized we had other blogging connections through this lovely woman in PA.  It's a small world out there, folks.

4.  In other fun turns of events, I was able to attend the HopeArts Festival Kick-Off event on September 10.  For those of you keeping score at home, Hope Chapel of Austin is the place where, in 2006,  I first stumbled on a church community trying to do faith and art well. 

Jason Harrod & Brian Moss at Art Show on Main 2009

Without ever meeting me, they  mentored our whole troupe of hopeful artists in upstate NY.  And, now, I live here.  And I get to participate with them in their next festival in July 2012.  How unbelievably, grace-full is that?  Not only did I attend, but the arts pastor, Brie Walker Tshoepe, asked me to write some reflections for their blog.  The very same blog I used to scour like a groupie, hoping something would rub off on me.  Jesus loves me, this I know...

You can read my reflections at HopeArts blog, click here.

5.  Speaking of grace-full, some kind-hearted new friends blessed my kids with free passes to Austin City Limits festival two weekends ago.  Not only were the passes free, but they were to the two shows my kids most wanted to see:  Fleet Foxes and Arcade Fire.

Arcade Fire @ ACL 2011

Crazy grace, right? 

I wanted Andrew to write about how he earned his free ticket, taking a job shuttling clients for a marketing firm's junket.  Yes, I said "driving clients".  That would be through a brand new city in a 15-passenger van, without a GPS. Oh, the price we'll pay for good music. 

 Maybe he'll do us the honor of writing it sometime, but the kid has the nerve to have a life so he's not here right now.  In the meantime, here's a video for you.  

I'll be back tomorrow with more odds 'n ends and assorted miscellany.
Until then, enjoy!

Farewell Gifts

I wrote about our friends giving us a fond farewell with so many abundantly-spilled-out gifts, right?  I thought I'd share a few excerpts and photos here in this space.

First of all, there've been worker-bee type gifts, getting our house ready to sell:  (several of these were the same horse-bee-angel people I told you about helping us move into this same house three years ago!)

Then, there were the two, extra-mile friends (and their little cutie-pie) who helped us organize all of our crap gently-used items for a big, ol' moving sale.  Plus, all the wonderful people who showed up to support us in the blazing heat and bought stuff (and I'm thinking more than a few of them bought stuff just to be nice.)

I didn't take a picture of the garage sale. Pretty average stuff.
 But this dinner to celebrate with our generous, kind-hearted, helper friends
 was way above-average Chinese cooking!

All along, behind my back, the Worship & Arts team I've been privileged to serve with for 13 years and lead for the last three were putting together the World's Most Perfect Farewell Party.  

It looked a bit like this:

With amazing works of culinary art that looked something like this:

After that, these people gave words, songs, laughs, and other assorted gifts with jaw-dropping generosity.  They made me laugh and they made me cry.  Sometimes both at the same time:

But, mostly, they made me cry.  Like when Coleen read an essay of the last eight years of our family's friendship.

"Let's go to Cleveland" we all said. "Test the waters of a Murphy/Gravelding mini-family vacation. If it sucks, at least we've seen the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame."...So we all chuck our anxiety-filled rejection issues about close friendships and decide to go all-in."

Scott's song-words in "Laughter and Lament":

"Seems like yesterday, church bells, Boston, October morning...
So swift the news came, left us feeling stranded without a warning.
But this family is bigger than a couple of thousand miles...So we'll put on our good brave face...and smile.

It's not phony you see, just a little hard to accept...Your stepping out, even letting go of dreams you've kept.
Cue the heartstrings, enough sad things...choking words too many or too few.
Strike up the band, let's join hands...maybe a praise chorus will do.

Everybody sing where you are...Tomorrow we may be too far
From each other and one another.
Everybody listen when we go...Hear the journey God only knows
The laughter and lament as we ebb and flow...."

Andrea's song, "Piece of You":

"We have shared each other's sorrows
Validated hurts and fears
Loudly applauded days of triumph
Bared our souls and witnessed tears

But we both know every great story twists and changes
Unexpected bends in the road
when today becomes little more than a memory,
I want you to know, I want you to know
There's a piece of you written upon me."

Brett's poem, "The Table":

"The anchoress has walked without a camera, with one hand plunged in

Puget Sound and the other in your exploding right.

She cries 'Glorious! Incandescent!' as she feels the spinning hole spin.

           The light

That burned her wings is showing mine within

The Mirror of Day's silver backing, Night.

It issues shimmering from shivering kingdom culverts. Before me

Tonight in light of its veilless valence I am able 

To see each molecule vibrate within this glow-glory

            table.

And I in trance substantial tell its story

Of insatiable realness, exorbitant and stable."

There was so much more. Dawn and Debbie's unassuming hilarity, Pastor Sal's words of affirmation, Christine's unknown challenge to me from Proverbs 31, Margaret's superb selection of readings from L'Engle.  And presents. Oh the presents!  Money to purchase art, hand-crafted jewelry, photographs and drawings.  I am a woman welled-over with gratitude.

And there's more to say.  But not today.  Today I need to sleep for a few hours and then pack my four courageous, kingdom-culvert children plus one speckly dog into two cars and follow my husband to Austin.  We're still licking our wounds a bit, I'll admit.  Still in mourning over lost dreams.  Still shaking our heads at the lunacy of leaving behind these once-in-a-lifetime kind of friendships.

But I'm thinking long about Louisville or Little Rock, we'll throw our black armbands out the window and holler at  the big Texas sky.  Or maybe, as the lyrics in my friend Scott's song:

"Just maybe you will be singing this song
When the whole Murphy clan grabs Austin by the hand and says,
'Baby, here we are'..."