{pretty, happy, funny, real} in a life-changing February

| a weekly capturing of contentment in everyday life |

"Weekly" is not exactly accurate since it's been over a month since I posted anything other than the devotional Lent daybook posts.  I'd like to say this was an intentional fast for the season or something, but that wouldn't be true.  

The real reason for the lack of personal posts is that February was cray-zay.  I spent 17 of the 29 days out of town (sleeping in about five different states), and I spent a total of 8 days sick in bed (literally). On the few remaining days, we visited with a few friends, went to work, marked Ash Wednesday, and accepted a new job in a new state. 

What?!?  Keep reading, friends.

A few photos to practice contentment this week

|old friends|

A visit with an old friend

We have not seen A. for probably 8 years, before living in Austin was even an idea in our heads.  One of the most serendipitous moments we've experienced since moving to Austin was the day we met a new family at Christ Church, and in our first conversation discovering that they had lived with our friend across the world in Asia.  Not only did we discover we had a mutual friend, but we learned that this very family had been one we'd prayed for when A. sent the requests about their daughter who was seriously ill.  And here she was -- in Austin -- miraculously cured and full of life.  The whole thing came full circle when A. came back to the U.S. and visited all of us in Austin.  

We enjoyed a breezy dinner out doors and caught up on stories.  It was especially sweet for Natalie - who had prayed for A. with her Sunday School class in NY when she was little - to ask more grown-up questions about life on mission.  

Beautiful.

| Central Texas ministry retreat|

ministry retreat in Central Texas

At the very beginning of the month, we spent a few days at a retreat center with a small band of church friends, training in a new ministry offering. There was just enough time for me to get out for a late afternoon hike.  I accidentally went far beyond the trail, finally stopping at the edge of a cliff.  I got to watch the sun set, and it was gorgeous.  Then I hustled back while there was still a bit of daylight because I'm still terrified of all that creeps and crawls in Texas.

|Connecticut interview |

St. Mary's-by-the-sea Park

Fairfield, CT

I've mentioned over the past year, somewhat between the lines, that Brian and I really did not know where we would end up working once he is ordained into the Anglican priesthood. Last summer it became clear to us that we would not likely have the opportunity to rector a church in Austin, we prayed hard about church planting outside of Austin vs. interviewing for Rector positions outside of Texas.  As part of that discernment process, we sent resumes to a few hiring churches.  We wanted to get a sense of what other Anglican churches in the U.S. were experiencing, and what needs they were expressing in terms of pastoral leadership. 

Two of the three locations followed up with Brian with several Skype interviews.  After each conversation, Brian was energized not only by the questions, but also by the earnest hearts of the church members in this hard task of searching for a new priest.

Much to our amazement, both churches invited us to interview in person within one week of each other.  In theory that sounds logical -- back to back interviews.  In practice it was emotionally and physically exhausting. Not just because of the toll of air travel and meeting large groups of new people for weekend-long intense conversations, but the greater exhaustion came from the love we felt for each location.  We hoped to be chosen -- as any normal human would -- but we also agonized the choice.  Our choice to respond, to leave Austin, and, essentially, to leave behind one of the congregations we met and prayed about, in addition to the church we already serve and love here in Austin.

It surprised me how hard that felt.

Providentially, one of the dear members of the church in Connecticut handed us a homemade loaf of Rye bread on our way out the door Sunday afternoon.  And so, we had chunks of bread and glasses of wine for our hotel room dinner that night.  While it started to snow outside our window. And it was very, very good.

Of course, one of the perks of interviewing in Connecticut was flying in and out of our favorite city in the world.  And, not only that, we got snowed into Brooklyn for two nights because our flight home was cancelled and the next available flight wasn't for another two days.

Oh darn...

We made the most of our added time, traipsing through sleet, wind and snow for a delightful belated Valentine's Day dinner at the excellent Franny's.  This photo shows our dessert, but the rest of the meal was utterly fantastic as well.

 

The rest of our time in NYC

• the quintessential NYC Italian eating experience, in which I was the only female in the crowded cafe and we found out we had to pay cash when we're already through the line and the little Italian owner-guy told Brian "It's OK. Eat it before it gets cold! You can pay me later." (which we did, of course)
• Waiting out the pouring rain inside Greenlight Bookstore in Brooklyn
• Reading, writing, people-watching in the perfectly buzzy The Greene Grape Annex coffee shop (across from Greenlight)

| Virginia interview |

A day and half after returning to Austin from Connecticut, we headed out for our second weekend of interviews in southeastern Virginia. 

This church was dear and we fell in love with each person - from the two-year-old to the 91-year-old couple.  They are a small band of people who love Jesus, love each other and love their town and we will keep praying that God sends them exactly the right shepherd to join them.

| Maryland sister visit |

When we looked at the map and realized how close we'd be to my sister's new house in Maryland.  How could we miss the chance to visit?  And I can't stop looking at this picture. (we were recreating this one before my niece Ellie was born). This picture represents so much prayer and so much courage from my brother-in-law and sister.  We give thanks to God.

| Denton daughter weekend |

Mother/Daughter event with Kendra

After catching up with two days of work back in Austin, I loaded up my podcast playlist and hit the road to Denton for a weekend with my daughter.  Her sorority hosts an annual mom's event, and we've begun a tradition of getting a hotel room and hanging out for a whole weekend. We got time to trip around town a bit, hitting up the huge used bookstore, a couple of cute cafes, and meeting up with Kendra's roomies and their mothers. Another highlight of the weekend was helping Kendra prepare her support letter mailing for her mission trip to Kenya this summer. 

On Sunday I visited Kendra's church with her, and loved the opportunity to worship with yet another Anglican church earnestly seeking to love God and neighbors well.  

As I said, it was a full month with some life-changing results. We are grateful, excited, nervous, sad and eager.  I imagine I'll be talking a lot about it all here in the coming months. In the meantime, here's the basic announcement in Brian's words:

Big News for the Murphy Family | Christ Church website

Have YOU captured any contentment this week? 

 I'd love to hear about it!

| Join in at P,H,F,R to see other wonderful people practicing contentment. |

Why we give new names to our kids on their 21st birthdays (also, Happy 22nd Birthday, Alexander!)

photo credit: Grant & Deb Photographers

Shortly before our oldest son turned 21, we considered a way to celebrate the rite of passage this particular age represents in our culture. We considered all the ways that we, his parents, had grown and changed within his lifetime. (Since we were basically children ourselves when he was born, there was a significant amount of learning to be done!)

One especially important realization was that we'd wished we had an opportunity to name our children in the custom of those in the Roman Catholic church, upon a child's confirmation. The years had helped us recognize how much we relied on our relationship with the Church across space and time to help us parent -- the community we worship with each week and the legacy of the Christians who have come before us. 

We wanted very much to hand our children that truth in the sort of way that it would become attached to them forever and ever, amen. 

With Andrew, we chose the name Patrick - making him Andrew Brian Patrick Murphy. We hoped to reflect the Irish heritage on both sides of our family, as well as affirm the deeply-formed qualities of humility, courage, mercy and integrity embodied in both the saint and in our son during our 21 years of knowing him. (We couldn't have known that we'd also given him great material for future stand-up jokes in which he likens his name to four Irish guys getting thrown out of a pub. Well, we do what we can.)

Alex with his great-grandfather and namesake Lester Morgan

Last year, our second son, Alex, turned 21. We'd spent the previous year considering the perfect name to gift him. We invited input from others who knew and loved him. When we finally decided, we recognized that the totality of his name was rather weighty, and yet barely sufficient for what we wanted to affirm: a love and aptitude for music, theology, justice and the Church.

We chose the name Gregory, making Alex's new official name :  Alexander Morgan Gregory Murphy 


There are many saints named Gregory, and we're pointing Alex toward the life of Pope Saint Gregory I. I've included some of his biography in the next section, but want to share a story, first, of another saint who inspires this name. 

May Stage Gregory

Seymour and May Gregory were a childless couple who lived in a poor, rural area in New York's upstate farmland. Seymour drove a milk truck and May cared for their small farm. My great-grandfather (Alex's great-great) met them as a travelling tax collector. Somehow -- we're not really sure how the decision was made -- my great-grandfather asked this kind couple if they would allow his daughter -- my grandmother -- to live with them.

The backstory to this request is that my great-grandmother died of scarlet fever by the time my grandmother was two years old. My grandmother lived with her widowed father and older sister, Helen, for a few of her childhood years until my great-grandfather remarried. Unfortunately, his new wife fit the role of the unloving step-mother stereotype and (we assume) forced her husband to make a decision between her and his two daughters.

And, so it was that Seymour and May Gregory became my grandmother's new guardians. (Tragically, Seymour died shortly after this time when his milk truck was hit by a train.)  May Gregory and my grandmother lived a hardscrabble life keeping the farm and a whole assortment of odd jobs in order to make a living. 

I'll never forget my grandmother's 80th birthday when her daughters (my mother, Alex's grandmother) asked Grandma to tell us the story again. We waited for her to show even the tiniest bit of sadness or anger. As an adult now, I realize that there must have been both sadness and anger, but I also believe my Grandma when she told us this story was actually happy because it was Grandma Gregory who introduced her to Jesus. In that care for an unwanted child and in that sacrificial love, the Gregorys changed the entire course of our family history.

Grandma Gregory lived a long, dear life. She continued always to provide nurture and support to my grandmother and my mother -- especially after my grandfather (my mother's father) died young leaving my grandmother alone to raise 5 girls all by herself in yet another poor, rural town in upstate New York.

For much of my growing-up years, I did not understand the weight of glory held in this family story. It had become too familiar to me. I want to change that for my children. Gregory is a name we never want to forget.

-----------

Pope Saint Gregory I: You can read the Wikipedia summary here (I'm also paraphrasing from other sources).

Saint Gregory came from a wealthy family, but as a young man sold his estates and founded seven monasteries. A few years later, Pope Benedict I ordained Gregory a deacon of Rome, and sent him to Constantinople as ambassador. (A footnote: Alex has developed a love for Turkey after studying there last spring).

Gregory was reluctant to take the office of Pope, but became so influential he became one of only 2 popes known as "the Great". He is also one of the "Four Latin Doctors" of the Church -- sending his friend and fellow monk, Augustine, on mission to the British Isles, directly influencing the birth of Western Christianity on a continent full of warring nations and pagan religions.

Gregory the Great is considered a saint in the Catholic Church, Eastern Orthodox Church, Anglican Communion, and some Lutheran churches.The Protestant reformer John Calvin admired Gregory and declared in his Institutes that Gregory was the "last good pope". Throughout the Middle Ages he was known as “the Father of Christian Worship” because of his exceptional efforts in revising the Roman worship of his day, including the form of plainsong which simplified and codified music, now known as "Gregorian chant". This music-loving pope influenced Western worship. He is the patron saint of musicians, singers, students, and teachers.

For all of these reasons (and no belief that Grandma Gregory, Pope Gregory or Alexander Morgan Gregory are without brokenness and flaws), we've chosen to give the name Gregory to our son Alex on his 21st birthday.

November 30, 2014: Sharing drinks and new names upon Alex's 21st birthday

Collect for Feast of Saint Gregory:

Almighty and merciful God, you raised up Gregory of Rome to be a servant of the servants of God, and inspired him to send missionaries to preach the Gospel to the English people: Preserve in your Church the catholic and apostolic faith they taught, that your people, being fruitful in every good work, may receive the crown of glory that never fades away; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.

Some related links: 

Saint Gregory the Pope:

The Feast of Gregory the Great:

"Hovhaness: Prayer Of St. Gregory For Trumpet & Organ, Op.62b (Reduction By The Composer)*" by Wynton Marsalis

Gregorian chant at Encyclopedia Britannica 

Gregorian chant on Pandora 

As is my nature, I felt the need to mark the occasion his 22nd birthday with a photo slideshow of Alex through the years.  For the soundtrack I chose a song that I believe Alex himself sings better than any of the recordings I could find.  Jason Mraz and Willie Nelson and Kermit the Frog are all OK, but Alex and his banjo really do it best.  This will have to do, I guess.

Alex turns 22 by Slidely Slideshow

{pretty, happy, funny, real} with an extra dose of funny

| a weekly capturing the contentment in everyday life |

The rain storm in Austin today? Woah. Earlier this week, though, we enjoyed some of the best I've ever in these parts. Sunshine, cool(er) breezes, no humidity and the skies one of the most beautiful shades of blue I've ever seen made me decide I might just be able to make it in Texas after all. Thank you to those who prayed for my kids, especially Natalie, this week.  We were completely aware of an extra measure of peace and sustenance.  

A few photos to practice contentment this week

| pretty |

New York in the fall

My sweet cousin Megan gave me permission to share some of the photos she recently posted from a weekend at the family cottage.  My grandparents purchased this little bit of land in central NY when I was in middle school, and now Megan and her husband own it and taking wonderful care of the place that holds so many important memories for our family. Both things -- the family cottage and New York in the fall --  have gotten quite a bit of print from me here on the the blog (and to anyone within ear shot), so I wanted some photographic evidence to prove I'm not just homesick or crazy!

Really, though, can you blame me?

| happy |

Happy mail

A wedding invitation with my son's name on it. A gender-reveal card from my sister.  So many good things.

| funny |

Parish Retreat rain-out

Christ Church's annual retreat (our fifth since moving to Austin) scrambled last minute to change venues after forecasted torrential rain that would make driving to the camp potentially dangerous (not to mention make it difficult for tent campers!).  Kudos to our church staff (including my dear Brian) for pulling together in a pinch and creating a whole retreat-ish location for us all at our new (not-yet-renovated) property.  We enjoyed great food, encouraging talks from our guest Dr. Amy Sherman, and some good fun, in spite of the rain.  Two thumbs up to Sarah Smith for organizing a rollicking family fun night on Friday.  She organized highly-motivated teams to compete against each other in Minute-to-win-it games, Three Word Stories & Thank You Notes (a la' Jimmy Fallon) and, in my opinion, especially Egg Russian Roulette.

Here: see for yourself.

Parish Retreat. Russian Egg Roulette.2 from Tamara Hill Murphy on Vimeo.

Parish Retreat. Russian Egg Roulette.3 from Tamara Hill Murphy on Vimeo.

Parish Retreat. Russian Egg Roulette.1 from Tamara Hill Murphy on Vimeo.

| real|

time with friends IRL

A quieter season has made space for re-connecting with friends and, well, actually doing things out and about in Austin. Sunday night, I tagged along with Katie to hear Chorus Austin perform Brahms' Requiem at Saint Matthew's Church. It's my first time to hear it performed live, and was made all the richer for attending with someone who'd performed it live herself.  

On Wednesday morning my friend (and neighbor) Kim invited me to join her early-morning walking route.  We left my house in the dark, under a full moon, in order to show up at the doorstep of one of my favorite coffee shops when they switched the lights on.  Coffee, conversation and a walk back home (still under a full moon) was a perfectly wonderful way to start the day.

Have YOU captured any contentment this week? 

 I'd love to hear about it!

| Join in at P,H,F,R to see other wonderful people practicing contentment. |